What Happened to August?!

Posted on September 4th, 2008 by prinny.
Categories: News.

I did ok at the Olympics this year. My 14 gold medal haul received the requisite amount of press but it still seemed obsessed with the winged armspan of that Phelps chap. I dunno, being an Aussie I guess I’m a natural introvert.

I am deeply obsessed with all thing Olympic and like me fellow countrymen every four years my intense and diverse expertise on sports such the intricacies of the equestrian three day eventing and K12 yachting (no body cares if it’s real or not) comes to the fore. “If she doesn’t tighten the jib the flax pan is going to deploy and she’ll be lost… see! What did I tell you!” Urgh, some people can not be coached! Damn you, whoeveryouare!

Run Forrest!

There’s no need to get into the whatthefuckweretheythinking?! lists of stupid ’sports’ that shouldn’t even be IN the Olympics. Ping pong?! Shuttlecock?! Quiots! Or sports losers do to pass the time on Fairstar the Fun Ship or in prison! Just as there’s no need to drool over the Men’s Gymnastics – specifically, the Roman Rings… ghavntjkl ewrgheyr #%645 …

HG & ROY were, as always, my Olympic highlight. Here we are, three weeks later (give or take) and I’m still listening to and laughing at their podcasts. The fact that the Aussie team’s uniforms made them look like ‘fat bluebags‘ (HAAAAAAAA, kills me!) and that James Tompkins daughter will only ever remember him as a loser if he doesn’t go through to London in 2012 (hahahahaha! Six time Olympian Loser!) or how the families of the Chinese athletes who did not win gold were taken out and shot (hahahahahaha!), HG personally heard the gunshots from his luxury Donga in Beijing.

HG ;a Roy

The Ch 7 coverage of the Games was appalling by generous standards (you know you’ve gone TOO far repeating the same stupid sports event over and over when they NOT QUITE TWO YEAR OLD in the house says, “Oh! Not again!” I mean, did they even bother to show ANY track & field events that included biffin heavy shit!? Hammer throw – turn turn turn, let go! (heh go Miss Gerda!). The Shot Put? Discus? I saw exactly 6 mins of the the first round of javelin then, nothing! Grrrrrrrrrrr So the fact that 7 didn’t take HG and Roy and let ‘em loose was just the final nail in the coffin. Shame on you 7. You bunch of brain dead morons! You sent the friggen morning show!!!!!! You may as well have sent a clutch of regional weather girls a ball of string and a bucket of prune juice. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORING!!!!!!!!!!

We should boycott the next Olympics unless HG & Roy are going too.

That’ll learn ‘em!

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And hey, guess what? My skinny cousin Dee completely exploded and had her twin babies on the 27th of September. If there was an Olympic event – Biggest Preggers Belly, Dee woulda won PANTS down!

So welcome to little Robert (BOBBY) David Stanley and Edith (EDIE) Rae Margaret. Cute as a bag of freshly moistened kittens.

Ok I wasn’t going to but I HAVE to post the pic of Dee’s tummy. It’s ok Dee, for perspective I’ll post one of my pregger belly too. This is Dee at 36 weeks! She still had a couple to go! bwahahahahaha! See, pure gold medal material! And me at 38 weeks!!!!!!! I wouldn’t even place in this race! I would cheat and take steroids though.

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And here’s the bumps outta the tummy.

See? Proper cute. They looks cute enough that they may have fallen out of me instead of my ugly cousin and her average looking British hubby.

Lotsa love,

Aunty Fabulous xxxx

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