Boss Of Everything

Happy Snot n Booger’s Day

Posted on February 14th, 2010 by prinny.
Categories: News.

Boys rock.

And here’s the card my beautiful B gave me (then ducked away out of arms reach). He’s ok. No lasting injuries or bruises that can’t be explained away with a simple,”oh this? It’s nothing… I… I… I just walked into my wife’s outraged fist.” Brekky at FooDoos earns him a LOT of points. Going out for brekky is better than going out for dinner. Just so’s you know!

Which reminds me – so does k.d.lang. k.d.lang, whom I could have eaten with a parfait spoon at the Olympic Opening Ceremony (but not before checking her carb content first. I mean, I’m happy to blow carbs (wey hey, Vicar!) but not unknowingly. I mean, yes, I’m whoreish and impulsive, but not reckless. Not reckless. (those of you with examples of my past recklessness, sit down and shaddap.) What was I saying? Oh yeah, rocks. She does.

(Grr, you’ll have to go here to see it, stupid Flash Uploader is ironically, being gay!)

That would be worth a week of zero carb lettuce and steak. Incidentally, it appears I could eat her when she’s at her mannishest. So if you had Feb ‘010 in the When Will She Come Out pool, you’ve done your dough. Mmmm. k.delicious.lang Hall-ahhh-looooo-yaaar yerself there, Missy. Hmm, perhaps the tote hasn’t quiet closed?!

February moves along in a haze of teething and kinder. Summer and air-conditioning. I’ve spent a fair deal of time fighting with Stegbar who have the WORST CUSTOMER SERVICE ON THE FACE OF THE PLANET! And the car needs new tyres.

But for right now? I have a calm house, filled with the sounds of sleeping children and Valentine Spunkshine (do your ears a favour!) and I know how happy I’ll be when B comes through that front door.

Life is good. Only k.d.lang singing the score to my day could make it better… and a truck load of money. Big bills only. Pounds sterling or Euros if I get to choose.

f xxxx

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What Happened to August?!

Posted on September 4th, 2008 by prinny.
Categories: News.

I did ok at the Olympics this year. My 14 gold medal haul received the requisite amount of press but it still seemed obsessed with the winged armspan of that Phelps chap. I dunno, being an Aussie I guess I’m a natural introvert.

I am deeply obsessed with all thing Olympic and like me fellow countrymen every four years my intense and diverse expertise on sports such the intricacies of the equestrian three day eventing and K12 yachting (no body cares if it’s real or not) comes to the fore. “If she doesn’t tighten the jib the flax pan is going to deploy and she’ll be lost… see! What did I tell you!” Urgh, some people can not be coached! Damn you, whoeveryouare!

There’s no need to get into the whatthefuckweretheythinking?! lists of stupid ’sports’ that shouldn’t even be IN the Olympics. Ping pong?! Shuttlecock?! Quiots! Or sports losers do to pass the time on Fairstar the Fun Ship or in prison! Just as there’s no need to drool over the Men’s Gymnastics – specifically, the Roman Rings… ghavntjkl ewrgheyr #%645 …

HG & ROY were, as always, my Olympic highlight. Here we are, three weeks later (give or take) and I’m still listening to and laughing at their podcasts. The fact that the Aussie team’s uniforms made them look like ‘fat bluebags‘ (HAAAAAAAA, kills me!) and that James Tompkins daughter will only ever remember him as a loser if he doesn’t go through to London in 2012 (hahahahaha! Six time Olympian Loser!) or how the families of the Chinese athletes who did not win gold were taken out and shot (hahahahahaha!), HG personally heard the gunshots from his luxury Donga in Beijing.

The Ch 7 coverage of the Games was appalling by generous standards (you know you’ve gone TOO far repeating the same stupid sports event over and over when they NOT QUITE TWO YEAR OLD in the house says, “Oh! Not again!” I mean, did they even bother to show ANY track & field events that included biffin heavy shit!? Hammer throw – turn turn turn, let go! (heh go Miss Gerda!). The Shot Put? Discus? I saw exactly 6 mins of the the first round of javelin then, nothing! Grrrrrrrrrrr So the fact that 7 didn’t take HG and Roy and let ‘em loose was just the final nail in the coffin. Shame on you 7. You bunch of brain dead morons! You sent the friggen morning show!!!!!! You may as well have sent a clutch of regional weather girls a ball of string and a bucket of prune juice. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORING!!!!!!!!!!

We should boycott the next Olympics unless HG & Roy are going too.

That’ll learn ‘em!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And hey, guess what? My skinny cousin Dee completely exploded and had her twin babies on the 27th of September. If there was an Olympic event – Biggest Preggers Belly, Dee woulda won PANTS down!

So welcome to little Robert (BOBBY) David Stanley and Edith (EDIE) Rae Margaret. Cute as a bag of freshly moistened kittens.

Ok I wasn’t going to but I HAVE to post the pic of Dee’s tummy. It’s ok Dee, for perspective I’ll post one of my pregger belly too. This is Dee at 36 weeks! She still had a couple to go! bwahahahahaha! See, pure gold medal material! And me at 38 weeks!!!!!!! I wouldn’t even place in this race! I would cheat and take steroids though.

___

And here’s the bumps outta the tummy.

See? Proper cute. They looks cute enough that they may have fallen out of me instead of my ugly cousin and her average looking British hubby.

Lotsa love,

Aunty Fabulous xxxx

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